Merry Christmas, Friends! I’m interrupting my IG break to share something that’s important to me. Holidays/traditions have proved to be some of the most difficult times for me as a special needs parent. These occasions of parties & celebrations & get togethers are so important but can often be exhausting for both children & adults. Disrupted routines, new food, new rules/expectations, & lots of noise… It’s wonderful, but a lot! The experience is even more amplified for individuals with special needs. Lydia is especially sensitive to sound & changes to routine (new people & places). With each holiday or special event, I get practice setting the RIGHT expectations, making each event not about what we do, but how to make it the most meaningful & positive for those present. I have learned to go into each experience knowing that we might (probably) have to adjust, & that if things look different than I was expecting, it’s ok. Some experiences go well, & others have left me broken-hearted & in tears. It is an ever-evolving journey.
Tonight we actually went to a holiday dinner with family! 🙏🏻 Because of 🦠, Lydia has very little experience in these settings. I came as prepared as I could, & we adjusted as we went. She spent time wearing noise-canceling headphones. We made sure she had a “safe place” she could go to be away from the crowd, & didn’t pressure her to interact with anyone if she wasn’t ready. As the day wore on, I watched her tolerance for the situation evolve from overwhelmed & avoidant, to curious, to venturing farther into the activities with fewer supports in place. I felt like cheering every time I watched her grow more comfortable doing something new—and I felt like cheering each time one of my family members met & respected her where she was.
By the end of the night, she was walking among everyone, & while I had expected to make it 2 hrs, we stayed 5. It doesn’t always go like this & it won’t always go like this. Today was a win; other days have ended in meltdowns. While some day I hope to see my little lady running amok with the pack of crazy cousins, today I savored simple moments, even the break we both took (& needed) lying on the floor. She reminds me always that love is the point. Whatever your holiday looks like, be there smiles or tears, I hope you know I love you. You are doing a good job. If today went wrong, we can try again tomorrow. That’s the reason that Baby was born on Christmas, anyway. 🙏🏻💛
*** #misslydiefaith #downsyndrome #theluckyfew
